A Megaman Parody!
by Star Eater
Summary: This fic spoofs the Megaman games. Read it and have a laugh.


Legal:

Megaman and related characters are owned by Capcom

Sailor Moon and related characters are owned by Takeuchi Naoko

  
  


Megaman Parody

By: Star Eater

  
  


The evil and quite insane Dr. Wily had made yet another batch of 8 robots to try and take over the world with. Of course, the good Dr. Light (who looks strangely enough like Santa Claus) had sent his worker-turned-fighter robot, Megaman, to stop them. 

This time, though, Megaman's journey is not going to be quite what he expects...

  
  


Megaman has managed to blast his way through the tool shop, killing the wimpy normal enemies that are useless but always seems to keep on being made for some reason. After about 3 minutes of doing this (and using Rush to get over some instant-kill spikes) Megaman arrives at the double doors that always give away the end of the level, and enters them.

Megaman charges up his blaster and waits for the inevitable Robot Master to come so he can whup his sorry butt all the way to Timbuktu and collect whatever weapon he has on him. And the Master did come.

(No, it's not Torgo.)

Hammer Man did some acrobatics and swung around his hammer quite a bit before filling up his life meter, which would signify the start of the battle. As soon as that happened, Megaman let rip his charged blast, which hit Hammer Man right on the noggin. Naturally, since Robot Masters don't like Big Blue Weenies barging in their stages and blasting them, Hammer Man got quite angry and closed in on Megaman. He swung his big hammer and not only missed, but got another charged shot for his efforts.

This continues for about 2 minutes, until finally Hammer Man hit Megaman with his hammer, sending Megaman all the way to the other side of the boss' room. Now, a blow like that would have killed near anyone in reality, but since this is a video game, Megaman's life meter only dropped about 5 points. (Besides, the players would get mad if there was an instant kill move on a boss.)

Megaman hit Hammer Man again with another charged shot. This caused the boss' life meter to get empty, so Hammer Man self-destructed. Then Megaman got Hammer Man's weapon - the Baka Hammer- and teleported back to Dr. Light.

  
  


The next stage saw Megaman in what looked like a bar - a bar with a lot of naughty things in it. The stage was really short because the door was right in front of Megaman, but it took Megaman 10 minutes to get to it because of all the nosebleeds he got from his surroundings.

After switching to the Baka Hammer (and turning tan to show this) he went into the boss' room. When he saw what the stage was, he decided to hide in the rafters to wait for the boss.

Hentai Man did a dance that was straight out of a porn movie before his life meter would fill up. But when Hentai Man was ready to fight, he didn't see Megaman anywhere. However, Megaman soon showed himself.

"How dare you use such a perverted theme in your stages! Because of this, I had a haunting experience which with terrorize me for the rest of my life! And in the name of the earth, I will punish you!" Megaman said this little speech with cheesy music playing and an image of Earth in the background. He did some poses to illustrate this.

Hentai Man was about to use his weapon on Megaman (and it's NOT that, you perverts) when suddenly, MORE cheesy music started to play. Both robots looked towards the source and saw the Sailor Senshi looking really angry.

"How dare YOU use our schtick for your own gain! Such an act will not be tolerated! In the name..."

As the Sailor Senshi droned on and on with their speech, Megaman saw that Hentai Man was oogling the Senshi. Taking his chance, Megaman mashed Hentai Man with his weakness, the Baka Hammer. This (naturally) destroyed Hentai Man, so Megaman absorbed Hentai Man's weapon - the Porn Magazine- and teleported home, the Sailor Senshi STILL going on with their speech.

  
  


When Megaman touched down on the floor of the next stage, he immediately regretted it, for there were televangelists and religious zealots armed with crosses and holy water.

"He's not of this earth! He wasn't made by God! GET HIM!"

After this war cry was shouted, the aforementioned religious fanatics chased after Megaman. Megaman decided to run to the boss, since rushing the stage would be much better than facing hordes of zealots.

Go to the boss, he did. Priest Man, after doing some holy rituals, started the battle. Megaman had a hard time avoiding all the various holy objects being thrown at him, as well as Priest Man's weapon, the Holy Water. But the battle was interrupted when all the zealots who were STILL chasing Megaman destroyed the boss' door and filled the boss' room.

Megaman then decided to do the one last thing he could do to save himself. He turned pink and used the Porn Magazine on Priest Man. The weapon hit the Robot Master head on, and once Priest Man saw what had happened, he paled.

The crowd of zealots turned towards Priest Man. Since the Porn Magazine now corrupted the boss, the crowd started beating him to death. And destroy him they did, but not before Megaman got the Holy Water and teleported out.

  
  


Back in Dr. Light's lab, Megaman was talking to Light about his disturbing experiences. It didn't last for long, though, because Lawyer Man burst into the house and slapped his weapon, the Law Suit, on Megaman. 

"You have destroyed Dr. Wily's property through vandalism, and this isn't tolerable. You must pay 1,000,000 Z to Dr. Wily - AAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!"

The Holy Water did wonders on Lawyer Man. Megaman got the Law Suit and teleported out to the next stage.

  
  


Sick of doing pointless platform hopping, Megaman decided to forgo the stages and just warp right to the boss.

Fanfic Man jumped down and begun the battle, but before Megaman could slap a Law Suit on him, Fanfic Man whistled for his friends, Popular Man, Lonely Man, and Pimp Man down to fight. Fortunately, Protoman, who was unpredictable at best, warped down to help.

Fanfic Man was easily smoked by the Law Suit, and his weapon, the Fan Fiction, proved equally destructive on Popular Man. The Popular Guy absolutely annihilated Lonely Man, and it was a good thing Megaman killed those Masters fast - Protoman was having lot of trouble with Pimp Man and his Pimp Justice.

The Lonely Shot took care of Pimp Man, and Megaman absorbed the Pimp Justice. But before he could thank Protoman, Protoman warped out.

  
  


Teleporting directly to Wily, Megaman got into a battle pose. Wily came in his new mech designed to crush certain blue robots, and he started to fire his weapons.

Roll jumped down with AK-47s blazing, which quickly took care of the mech. Wily ran away, and readied his saucer.

However, Megaman shot a Porn Magazine at Wily. Wily got a nosebleed and passed out.

  
  


With Wily back in jail, the world rejoiced before going back into their daily routine. Of course, several months later Wily would escape from Jail and do the same 8 robot thing all over again, but Megaman had done his job.

Besides, if Wily didn't escape, Capcom would be out of a job.


End file.
